Talking Dead Sneak Peek of The Walking Dead S9 Ep15 “The Calm Before”
Talking Dead Sneak Peek of The Walking Dead S9 Ep15 “The Calm Before”
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Sneak Peek of The Walking Dead S9 Ep15 “The Calm Before”
Talked About Scene on The Walking Dead S9 Ep14 “Scars”
Michonne Saves Judith in The Walking Dead S9 E914 “Scars”
Summary: After a frustrating argument with Michonne over her safety concerns and harsh new rules stretches the Reader to her limits, Negan steps in to cheer his girl up
Voices echoed through the tall hall of the church, angry voices stuck in a thick discussion. You were part of it too, had been to be more exact until a few minutes ago, you were tired of it by now, frustrated even more.
It was only a half day ago that Negan had returned to the cell, not more than an hour or two ago since Michonne and the others had returned from the Hilltop with devastating and chilling news.
Jesus was dead, killed by a new emerged threat, a group that was walking disguised as the dead within them, killing everything that was coming into their way. Michonne and the rest had managed to catch one of them on the day after, the daughter of their leader who was now caged up in the one of the Hilltop’s cells, waiting for what else was to come.
The Hilltop wasn’t the only community that was struggling, the Kingdom was too, but not with the living dead, but their supplies. Their fair should save them, bring them back into the game but as always, Michonne had disagreed to let Alexandria participate, not even after a second plea of Carol.
And this wasn’t everything that had prattled down on you just a little while ago, Rosita was fine again, but pregnant and not from Gabriel but Siddiq, after a short and unmeaningly affair before Rosita’s relationship with the priest had even begun. The whole mood in the council’s meeting room was already tense, but putting these two men in here didn’t add up to a better atmosphere.
The cherry on the top really was Michonne right now, her repeating lecture on safety concerns that was slowly but surely cutting Alexandria off of every other community, fueling your frustration.
It was the same damn thing every time, about every little thing.
No matter what the council decided, Michonne did in the very end what she wanted, almost as if the council only existed anymore to make it seem like she wasn’t the only source of power in Alexandria. It was nerve-recking, especially after you had fought for their trust and a place on the council for so long, a council that now didn’t seem to even exist anymore.
You had often discussed with her about this, just like the others, but today you were zooming out, trying to process the everything that was happening around you, including Negan’s return to the cell.
You’d been there when the door had fallen into the lock again, watching as he laid the new leather jacket next to the bed and slipped back into the prisoner’s clothes and you’d lie if you’d say your heart hadn’t been caught up in a row of stings. Negan seemed fine with it, more than you had ever thought, but you kept seeing him before your inner eye. In the woods, in freedom, with his arms wrapped around you and your head buried into the soft leather that gave you flashbacks to the time before the prison.
You wanted him here with you in Alexandria, but you wanted him to be a free walking men as well, and those two components didn’t fit well, at least not to everybody but you and him.
A thick sigh left your lips as you leaned yourself against one of the church’s benches while another row of voices echoed through the hall, strong enough to catch your attention this time.
“What does is mean for Alexandria to survive if it means that the Kingdom falls?”, Siddiq asked, stepping closer towards Michonne, his eyes filled with disbelieve as nothing more than coldness pressed in over Michonne’s face.
“It means, Alexandria survives.”
And with these words she shot him any even icier glare, holding his glance for a couple more seconds before breaking it off and pushing herself past the table the others were surrounding. She was rushing as fast out as always after such discussions, leaving a tension in the room that you could almost cut with a knife.
“Great”, you heard Gabriel scoff, propping himself with his hands onto the table while he squeezed his eyes shut in frustration.
“We should go back to work, we can’t do anything more for the moment”, you heard Laura say as you pushed yourself away from the bench’s backrest and glanced at Siddiq who was still standing right where Michonne had left him, before he forced himself out of his trance and nodded slowly.
“Yeah”, he grumbled, the annoyance clearly stuck in his voice before he let a sigh fall from his lips and glanced at you, “Lets get back to the infirmary, at least what we’re doing there is useful.”
The sun was already beginning to vanish behind the skyline of Alexandria’s walls and the tall trees behind them as you slipped your arms through the sleeves of your jacket, ready to leave the house after taking a hot shower that had washed a little bit of the load of stress the day had put on your shoulders until you had finished work a half hour ago.
A uncomfortable tension had laid over the infirmary all day, fueled by Siddiq’s frustration because of Michonne’s decisions, paired with the Rosita drama that wasn’t much of a good mix and you were everything else than cheerful after this morning’s meeting as well. You had never thought you would say so, but by now, you were glad that Michonne had moved out of the house and into one of the townhouses. The reasons back then had nothing to do with the situation now, instead her decision had been urged by the pain Rick’s death had forced up, leaving stains all over the house as well as it had been supported by the more fitting rooms for the kids in the townhouse, still you were unfortunately glad about it now.
You tried to shake the thoughts about Michonne off, letting a relieved sigh out as you now felt the smooth leather hugging your body, rising your anticipation to come back to Negan as you walked into the hallway, ready to finally leave.
You were already swinging in a more comfortable mood before the door suddenly flew open, squeaking in protest as it arched by the power the push had forced on it.
Your eyes widened immediately as your gaze glued to the entrance, catching the woman who was standing in the doorframe, furiousness in her eyes, brows puckered in anger and a chest that was rising and falling harshly.
“You’ve been talking to him?”, Michonne hissed as she stepped into the house, rising the confusion within you as she threw the door back into its lock.
“What?”, you asked, watching as she moved closer and let out a bittersweet huff.
“You’ve been talking to Negan about the council?”, she growled, shooting you a dangerous glare, “Bad enough that he’s eavesdropping on us but that you slip him intel-”
“I’m not slipping him intel”, you cut her immediately off, feeling how the frustration of this midday was boiling up again within you, mixing with new ones fueled by her accusation,”I’m talking to him, did you expect anything else?”
“I expected you to be responsible”, she growled, her eyes narrowing in even more anger, the very same one that began to grow in you as well.
“I am”, you quickly and firmly retorted before she could throw anything else at you ,”He isn’t doing any harm. Think he’s proven that enough.”
“Oh so you two agreed in advance about what to say?”, she snapped as you just stared in utter confusion at her that drowned the frustration for a tiny moment.
“Your boyfriend just told me to trust him a little more. Even let him be an advisor in matters of leader decisions”, she hissed with another bittersweet chuckle, as if she had talked to someone out of his mind.
“I don’t wanna hear it, (Y/N). I’m closing his windows and I strongly advise you to not talk to him about anything concerning the council anymore”, she cut you off in the matter of a millisecond, leaving you to process what she had just said that made you snap out of the frustration that had whirled back through you, and instead filled you with shock.
“You’re closing his windows? Michonne you can’t do that”,you said, the bitterness gone out of your voice and replaced with instant worry about Negan ,”It’s his only way to get some of the world outside that cellar.”
For a moment, you forgot her as fear flooded your veins. He already once had nothing but the cellar, he had once been completely cut off and you had seen to what that had pushed him. Shit, you had seen him on the edge of losing himself.
What if taking the window away, the interactions with Judith, simply hearing other people’s voices and having day light, what if that would urge him to fall back into a hole again, or to at least make him tangle on its edge?
“Well that’s the plan”,Michonne brought you back to reality, befuddling you even more with her icy coldness, “He is a threat.”
“He’s not he-”
“He’s a monster, nothing else. In case I need to remind you again he killed two of our friends. He took Glenn’s chance to be a father”, she growled and with that, she shifted a switch within you. You’ve had to hear these things over and over again over all these years until it seemed like a record that played on endless loop, all while the people who called him a monster had done just as monstrous things, with the only difference that they were now playing the innocent lambs.
“And Rick didn’t? From Gracie’s dad by massacring him? We didn’t kill a whole fucking outpost?!”, it suddenly shot out of you, anger raging in your voice as you passed past the points of keeping your calm. You weren’t one of the people to go off by the littlest inconvenience, but this was too much by now. Too much frustration, too much anger, too much injustice and hypocrisy.
“Don’t take his name-“
“What? Cause it’s the truth?!”, you snapped before she could yell further at you and forbid you to speak. Rick was a risky topic, but she wasn’t taking a single fuck about your feelings, about your issues no matter if they were of personal matter or about her leading style, so why should you? Why should you if those things she was saying were turning things upside down, pushing them to let them shine in false light just because she liked it that way.
“I’m so fucking tired of you all being huge fucking hypocrites acting as if you’re saints and he’s the devil. you’re judging with double standards”, you hissed, trying to not turn your voice into a shrill yell while the frustration you had build up was pushing further and further in on you,”He’s done fucked up stuff but so have we, so have you. He’s been for seven and a half years in there, if we’re going by your logic we all would need to be locked up”
Your breaths were heavy and harsh, almost as if they were cutting cracks into your throat, but you didn’t care. This goddamn injustice was going on and on for years now, sentencing him to a whole life in prison while she wasn’t an ounce better and was allowed to live her life freely, as if she hadn’t massacred people without the bat of an eyelid.
You had all done the most terrible things to survive, but only for him it got turned into the most horrible deed a human being could do.
“Careful”, she warned you, stepping closer as her eyes bored into yours.
“So this is gonna be like always, huh? Someone has another opinion and you shut it down, no matter what”, pure frustration was speaking out of you, calmer now but still firm, fueled by the discussion from earlier. She huffed, shaking her head before her eyes arrowed once more dangerously.
“Do you really want to test me?”, she asked, a just as dangerous calmness spread over her face,”I can take your privileges of seeing him, just like that.”
For a moment, you just stared at her in disbelief, shocked by the person in front of you that didn’t seem at all like the friend you once had, and pushed into more fear of actually having to fight for seeing Negan.
“Yes I can”, she cut you off, glaring at you before she took a step closer to you, her voice dangerously calm,”And you know what I’ll do too? I’m excluding you of the council. You’re endangering us by slipping a prisoner intel.”
For a second, you felt like you were falling into a hole yourself, as if she had pulled the rug from beneath your feet.
You had fought for your place there, no matter what you were thinking about the current situation. This place at the council had taken much time and work, she couldn’t just take that away from you. She couldn’t just exclude you because of a disagreement,
“For the last time, I’m not slipping him-“, you tried to defend yourself one last time before you caught in her glance that it was over for now, that no matter what you would say now would make the situation any bit better, but would actually make it worse, in the most horrible case for Negan too.
”I really don’t know you anymore. I always thought you’d be the reasonable one. Turns out you’re not”, you huffed, pain finding its way into you about the friend in front of you that was completely lost now.
“If you think that. Then so be it”, she coldly retorted, as if nothing of what you had said just nearly touched her, nor made her care, letting the shock and frustration overshadow the pain within you quickly.
This was the situation seven years ago all over again.
Negan was the monster, you were the traitor and everybody else was the knight in shining armor.
And these old, conserved feelings let more anger wash up in you, along with the thought of what could await Negan now that she really seemed to go through with her plan no matter what you said. And this all was pressing in on you, like a burden that was collapsing on your shoulders.
You stared at her for a moment longer, a small part of you hoping that she’s still change her mind, let at least shine through that she cared a little but nothing,
There was nothing but coldness in her eyes.
“Screw You, Michonne. Seriously, screw you”, it slipped out of your lips, your voice trembling as you couldn’t keep any of your fury cooped up anymore that mixed with the deep rooted agony.
You didn’t care if you were being the one fleeing right now as you shoved yourself past her and rushed out of the house, you were just done with the whole day so far.
You just wanted to get to Negan now.
The way to the cell felt longer than usual.
With each step you could feel more tears forcing themselves into your eyes, turning your view into a blurry mess while all the thoughts and things Michonne had said were pressing in on you. You were able to keep them in for now, keep them from spilling over but while you kept them in it felt like you were bottling them dangerously up, forcing them to escape later with a harsher pressure.
It felt like the old times, like all these years ago and you hated every single bit of it.
Your whole body stayed tense until the very moment you stepped into the cell and felt Negan’s worried glance on you until his strong arms wrapped around you and finally pulled you into his soothing embrace.
”What happened?”, you heard him ask as you buried your head into his warmth, the tone in his voice indicating that part of him already knew what this was all about, still, you answered.
Negan’s arms were still wrapped around you as you found yourself sitting on the edge of the bed, leaning into his side while you tried to put the day into words and listen to his own encounter with Michonne as well, to her mocking in response to his statement that he had changed, to what she was planning to do with the cell, and on top of all, to Judith who had just tried to get help with her homework and was now most certainly in trouble as well.
The words just kept spilling out of your both mouths, as if the bottle was finally opened and all the suspense could flow out.
”Shit…I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have mentioned you in any fucking way, I-”, he grumbled, utter guilt stuck in his voice after hearing of your exclusion of the council, made my Alexandria’s leader herself.
”This isn’t your fault, she would’ve known either way”, you mumbled back, glancing up into his hazel eyes that ran over your face, brushing over your features as he slowly nodded, before he gulped thickly.
”The thing about the windows…, don’t worry, alright?”, he asked, holding you a little tighter as he glanced from you to the windows and back, all while you shook your head and felt the next rush of frustration coming over you.
“No Negan, this isn’t fair”, you said, the mumbling from before turning into a tense and now also trembling mess, ”She can’t just keep pretending that she’s the saint and cut you off from everything as if you’re some blood thirsty monster.”
Your breath was heavy enough to make your chest shake harshly as all the thoughts that had rushed through your head during your argument with her streamed back into your head.
You had told him everything, everything but about your fear of a relapse.
You just didn’t want to worry him even more or worse, provoke a backslide all the more by showing him your fear.
But you couldn’t fool Negan, couldn’t in the past, couldn’t do now and as his arm around you tightened and his eyes kept sticking to your face, as if he was trying to read your thoughts you knew already what he was gonna ask next.
”There’s more, huh?”, his own voice was filled with concern, paired with the knowledge that you were keeping something from him to not worry him more than he already was.
A thick sigh fell from your lips as your glance wandered from him to the cement ground for a moment, realizing as always that you had to tell him, no matter the effect it could have.
“I’m just…I’m afraid”, you mumbled, licking your lips nervously as you glanced back up at him and allowed a shivering breath to leave your lips before you rose your voice,”I don’t…I don’t want you them to push you into that hole again.”
“I won’t fall into that hole again, Baby”, he retorted in the matter of seconds while his tension filled glance grew softer and his arms held you a little tighter.
“Come on, as long as I got ya I’ll be all fine”, he added in the very next moment, watching your reaction closely as he gave you a small chuckle that paired with a small grin ,”Seriously, things are different now than they were back then.”
“I know…I’m just frustrated…”, you mumbled, feeling how he reached up and let the palm of his large hand cup the side of your face to let his thumb brush over it, brushing of some dried tears and soothing you with his touch.
“I know, Sweetheart”, he muttered with a nod, leaning in to press a small kiss to your lips while you softly nodded and allowed yourself to sink for a moment into him.
“But this isn’t done…I’ll talk to her again when things have calmed down a little. I won’t let her take this away from you”, you added as soon as his lips parted from yours, giving in to an inner urge to not loose the very last hope you had, maybe to not go crazy once for all.
“You first get back into the council, that’s more important than my windows”, he softly chuckled, pulling you closer before you quickly shook your head.
“No, it’s not”, you mumbled with a soft sigh, “Council’s one shitshow either way, as long Michonne doesn’t change it’s just sham.”
Negan just softly nodded, keeping you close as he leaned in for another kiss and let his lips caress over yours, allowing to let the frustration beat the retreat a little and instead fill you with comfort until he backed a little away and gave you a slight grin.
“Whatever comes next, we’ll get through this. Fuckin’ know it”
“Come here”, Negan mumbled as he settled a few soothing kisses and touches later into the pillow at the end of the bed, spreading his arms and nodding with a soft smile towards them. Slowly nodding you responded by shifting towards him over the sheets, sniffing just slightly for the last time before you dove into his embrace.
With a soft hum you nuzzled your head into the curve of his neck and moved your leg over his hip, allowing you to sink into his side as your arm slung around his torso and hugged him back.
His arms were holding you tightly as his lips pressed a warm kiss to your forehead, allowing his beard stubble to tickle your skin and form a small smile on your lips.
“Y’know, I still got something for ya….hope it lifts your mood a little”, he mumbled after only few moment had passed as he shifted a little and stuck his fingers into his pant’s pockets, rummaging as you hummed in confusion and heard him letting out a low chuckle.
“Won’t be my dick this time, I promise”, he laughed quietly before the movements stopped as he slowly got his hand out of his pockets. “Don’t know if you thought I forgot about it but damn, I didn’t”, he mumbled, as he formed his hand into a fist, hiding what was hidden within, “Couldn’t repair your bracelet but I…well lets say I improvised a little.”
With these words and another small chuckle he opened his hand, revealing what was hiding in its large palm.
A ring, the one that had just a small while ago laid in the box with the goods he was trying to repair. Before the troughs of its metal had been empty, its stones gone for years but now they were filled up again with the tiny white diamonds that had once belonged to your bracelet.
“Finished it before gettin’ out…just weren’t sure when to give it to ya, so now seems like a good moment”, he said, a little tension stuck in his voice as you slowly lifted yourself a little, enough to prop yourself on one elbow and glance at the small good in his hand.
“It’s beautiful”, you mumbled, feeling how a larger smile was growing on your lips as soon as you touched the ring and realized how many curses he must have lost over it, trying to glue the small stones with his large hands to the thin ring. He’d lost his patience over all the other goods, but he had finished this one, no matter how many nerves it must have cost him.
“Damn glad you like it”, you heard him mumble as he shifted a little up in the pillows as you glanced once more at the familiar stones that twinkled in the light before you looked up into Negan’s hazel eyes.
“’Course I do…thank you so much”, you said, keeping the smile on your lips as you leaned in and kissed him softly, caressing your lips over his as his touch made the frustration vanish some more and brought you deeper into this moment in which you could forget about the rest of day that suddenly seemed to become much better.
“How much did you curse over it?”, you chuckled softly against his lips as he leaned in to peck you once more.
“Oh way too much…doesn’t matter tho”, he mumbled, pulling you into another kiss until you could feel him tensing a little as soon as your lips left his.
“I just..I want you to know what I want that little fucker to represent”, he mumbled as you backed a little away, enough to glance into his eyes and catch the muscles in his face twitching, almost as if he was nervous.
“Meant what I said…as long as we two got each other everything’s fine as hell, was always that way”, he grumbled, sitting himself a little more up as he still held onto the ring in his hand, “You and me, that’s all we fucking need.”
“Yeah”, you mumbled with a nod as you reached up and caressed your fingertips over his beard stubble, smiling softly at him. You could feel him shifting a little more, enough to sit straight up and reach out to your legs to pull them over his legs and hug you closer as he cleared his throat softly, clenching his jaw as he grew a little more nervous.
“I know I can’t marry you the damn real way here…shit, can’t even propose the fuckin’ way I’d like…I’m just”, he stopped, shaking his head as he run one hand over his stubbly jaw ,”Talkin’ too much”
Your heart was already speeding up as you heard his words echoing through your head and felt how his hand that was still holding the ring was beginning to trace over your leg, nervously fumbling on the loose threads.
“I just, I want you to know that we both are set in damn stone,…real damn marriage…not how it was with- them...”, he mumbled, struggling on that one word before he glanced up at you and pulled you a little tighter against him,”The fucking real way.”
The smile on your lips grew wider as you watched him relax a little in response to your reaction, grinning as he bit his lip.
“And shit, we’ve actually been having that for all this time…no matter if we talked about it or not…you’re mine and holy shit I am fuckin’ yours, with neck and crop…and dick”, he chuckled with a wider grin, playfully squeezing your waist before he stroked softly along it, “And that won’t fuckin’ ever change.”
“We’re the real damn deal”, he added with a soft chuckle, holding you close as you nodded softly, feeling the warmth spreading further through your body, sweeping into every little inch of yours and turning the rest anger into happiness.
“Yeah”, you mumbled, running your hand up his chest until you let it rest on its center and glanced happily at him,”We are.”
“Now that finger looks a little naked, huh?”, Negan grumbled in the next moment, nodding down to the hand on his chest before he glanced for a short moment up to grin at you and moved the ring closer towards it.
It only needed another soft nod of yours for him to pick your hand up and slip the slim ring over your finger, just as smooth as you had once done it when you had tried its damaged form on months ago, even though it felt so much better now.
And as your lips crashed onto his this time it felt like you were giving each other a silent promise on top of it, sealing off what had already been clear to the both of you all these years. Of course, you couldn’t marry with all the bells and whistles but Negan was right on this, as long as you both knew what your relationship meant to you, it was more than enough.
“Y’know, if you wanna and if the situation will ever allow it, we can do it with all the little shit…hell, I can do more to make this all better…I-”,
“You don’t need to…this is already perfect”, you muttered back, a soft smile still curling your lips as he stopped for a moment and backed away, enough to glance at you and raise his brows.
“Negan, this is all I need. If we ever can get married the official way, I’ll marry you without batting an eyelash, but you don’t need to do more…giving the ring now so you can cheer me up and take care of me is so genuine and sweet, and real. That’s the best”, you said, glancing from the ring to his hazel eyes that began to soften even more, just like the smile on his lips that grew larger and the warmth in you that took over once for all.
You could still feel the smile as his lips caressed once more over yours, kissing you deeply as he held you tighter, as if he was never planning on letting you go again. “I love you”, he grumbled against your lips, pecking them as he sighed contently, “More than fucking anything.”
“I love you too”, you mumbled back, smiling softly as your fingers caressed over the salt and pepper stubbled, electing a small purr from deeply within his chest before he shifted a little with you on the bed, enough to move the both of you into the pillows to hold you even tighter.
“By the way…I’m not fuckin’ sweet”, he mumbled with a low chuckle as soon as you had cuddled deeper into his embrace, urging a small laugh to fall from your lips as you backed away again and glanced into his playful and teasing eyes.
“Yeah, you are”, you softly chuckled, grinning at him as you ran your hand over his firm chest, up until you could rest it on his neck and caress the sensitive skin while the tiny diamonds of the gift that was stuck to your finger twinkled in the rest sunlight,”No way you can prove me wrong on this.”
“Oh I could think of a way or two”, he thickly chuckled, grinning suggestively at you while his tongue slipped slowly over his lower lip, “Want me to try out?”
“Sure”, you chuckled back, already feeling how he was pulling you closer before you shot him a playful grin, “Still, you won’t convince me.”
“Oh, you’ll see, Baby. You’ll fucking see”
(The gif isn’t mine/ it was originally posted by dancing-at-the-funeralparty)
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Michonne in The Walking Dead S9 Ep14 “Scars”